Well, I hate to say this... but I think I'm officially done with art and illustration.

I mean, It's ridiculous that I'm dropping a part of myself I've established over the course of fifteen years. I was always known as "the art guy" at school, and people seemed to enjoy my illustrations. However, I haven't felt inspired to pick up a pencil in five months, and I believe It may stay that way.

I can't come up with any freaking ideas, and I've realized that my art style seems so limited, and my talents as an illustrator aren't what I want them to be. My backgrounds suck, my composition sucks, my lighting sucks.

People say practice, practice, practice, but honestly... what's the freaking point anymore?

I guess when I tried turning illustration into a career, it started to go downhill. Being looked down at school because I was an illustrator, and not some stuck up "graphic designer", really got to me. Doing what I loved just changed. All the work I put into school, just made me hate the industry.

Then, on top of that, I haven't been able to find work, nobody gives a shit about what I do... and those select few that did, would contact me with a potential job offer, only for me to never hear from them again. The only job in design I had recently, I ended up getting fired from...

... but when you start creating design, only to end up being asked to update twitters and facebook pages for the company, it' probably for the best.

I mean fuck, even DA has ruined art for me...

There are several popular artists on DA who have racked up a ton of page-views, although it's obvious that their art sucks ass, and the only reason they're so popular is because their gallery consists entirely of cartoon characters like Kim Possible or the TDI girls touching each other... Seriously people, try and draw something other than just pin ups of popular cartoon characters... it's been done to death.

Also, what the fuck is up with inflation porn? fucking weird is what it is.

What about people who are super good at imitating other artists? Like the handful of artists on DA who's style is almost identical to Joe Mad!? NEWSFLASH: He's going to get all the credit because you're only good at copying his already established art style.

I'm not asking you to give me advice or pity, because I just don't fucking care anymore... the only deviations of mine that get any recognition are fan art depictions, and I am just sick of doing them.

I apologize for this rant, and you may think I'm just being some pompous asshole who's fishing for compliments, which is fine, but I needed to get all this off my chest. These feelings have been bottling up inside of me for several months, and I just need release, and closure.

It's funny, but here is my first journal entry on DA:

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First Journal Entry
Thu Mar 31, 2005, 4:20 AM
Bangtastic!

Whoo...
It's been less than a week, and already a lot of you guys have been showing interest in my stuff... Thanks!

I am a new artist here, and in general, I'm a little easier to push around. What I basically mean is that I am willing to do art trades, collaborations, Deviant fan art, requests... I'm up to anything right now! (Plus, I'm pretty bored...) So send me a message if you want something done!

Also, Hopefully in the next week, I will finally hear from the Graphic Design School here at the U of M. I've been busting my balls for the last two years to get transferred... Wish me luck!

---end---

Thanks for listening... I hope the rest of you can continue your passion for art, but as for me, this shop is closed.

I am also no longer accepting commissions or freelance work.